Refugee
It’s odd having no working computer to call my own.
I feel — the only way to describe it is homesick.
After a hard day, you want to go home.  You want to stretch out, kick back, settle in.  Glass of wine, something to read, or listen to.  Everything’s where it should be, or at least where you expect it to be. Â
You’ve tweaked your surroundings so that they’re  comfy.  Maybe you have some improvements in mind, but no rush, you’ve got what you need. Â
You don’t have to adjust, adapt, second-guess or fuss.  You’re home.
Instead, I am, at the moment, continually in Guest Mode.Â
Be polite, don’t make a mess.  Clean up after yourself immediately. Don’t hog the best chair, the cheesecake, or the bathroom. Â
Yesterday I turned on my computer, hoping that it would operate long enough for me to complete a total backup of all the information on it (it did).  When it came up, there was my favorite wallpaper: a gorgeous photo of the Veil Nebula.
Veil Nebula
snf.
And all my little icons were where they were suposed to be, and ….
Man, am I a dope for feeling homesick for my computer? Because it really does feel like that!
December 8th, 2009 at 7:45 am
Makes sense to me. I find that the older I get, the more I seem to invest familiar places and objects with Deeper Meaning. I thought the opposite would be true–that I’d become more hard-nosed and realistic as I aged, but it’s not happening. Part of it is probably an attempt to stave off the inevitable–change and loss.
December 8th, 2009 at 10:49 am
Well, I think you’re right about things becoming more invested with Deeper Meaning. Everything seems to resonate more, and more easily, and with many more echoes. But I hope it’s not automatically due to getting older! I’d prefer to think that I’m becoming wiser and more perceptive because… well, I just am! But I suppose the mileage does help…
As for staving off change — Actually, I tend to like change. Sometimes, when I don’t get enough change, I have to artificially create some. Like moving my furniture, swapping out all the pictures on my walls. I have great big bulletin boards with great big images pinned up, exactly because I can change them easily.
But, losing my computer. Damn. Got no base of operations, no place to hang my hat.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
Hang in there, just another couple of weeks and then you’ll be able to expense the new computer. If you want to put that gorgeous pic on the desktop, that’s fine with me; Tabitha has been bored with the pic she’s got for a while.